Sunday, April 12, 2009

Life is so damn ironic sometimes, it's cruel. The last few days, the tables have been completely turned on me. A lot of times, Kelsey will tell me how she feels that Wendy and I often "buddy up", and kind of just be "the two of us", rather than "the three of us", when we're all together. And I didn't really notice that, until lately. The other day, well, this past weekend, I met them at Caribou one night--this past Friday. Kelsey had gotten back from driving, and I was coming home from Bryce's. It was really ackward, because they kept joking around about stuff that had happened earlier that evening, and stuff. And I just kind of laughed, and joked around, even though I had no idea what they were talking about. And for the first time in a long time, I felt completely left out, and totally alone. I don't know, maybe that's because I deserved it, I don't know...I mean, I called Kels and she said she was with Wendy, and so I just kind of invited myself to come see them, but I only stayed for like, 25 minutes or something, I don't know, but yeah. And then yesterday, during lunch, we were in Red's room, hanging out, talking, like we always do. And suddenly, they started talking about stuff, like, Wendy's work, her sister, stuff that happened when I wasn't there. Now, I don't want this to seem like I want people to ONLY talk about me and stuff that happened with me when I'm around, I don't care. But I guess I felt like I was just out of it; like they had gone to a party and were talking about the cute boys and I wasn't there to get in on some of the window shopping. I don't know...And like, today, we went to Kelsey's house during 4th hour, because we had 1st lunch (we had a choral group come during band), and like, they were all chatty and just talking about different people in Jarod's (Kelsey's bro) old year books, and I just kind of sat there, looking dumb. I don't know.

There's a good chance I'm making this out to be bigger than it is. I don't know, Kelsey has just seemed really off lately, like, she'll be super happy with Wendy, but just kind of ignore me and act unhappy and such. I don't know? Maybe it's just me. I guess I'm just so used to being part of a "group", which, I know, sounds extremely self centered, but like, I don't know. I'm going to go do homework, I told Courtney I'd go to her "candle party" tonight, *groans* and I'm bringing Bryce. Heh. Her mom is making cocktail weenies!!! Wheee!!!! Haha. Our presentation went well, I was pretty nervous, and Brie didn't know half the numbers in French. Oh well. I gotta run!

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